KV 2 BKN XII English 20 June 2020

KV2 BKN English XII Introduction 20 June 2020

GODucation

Pointing to a god’s picture

My friend’s son asked me - 

“What’s this?”

I thought and played safe - 

“Ask your mother.”

But shouldn’t he already know?

Like breathing! Naturally!

If God is just ‘knowledge’ 

Won’t he die if we don’t teach!

Not today. 

“Mamma mamma what’s this?”

The child asked.

“Ooooh that’s almighty - 

Omnipresent and OMNIPOTENT”,

Thus GODucation starts.

That Non Believer’s Fate

I am a believer of God, my neighbour is not,

Both of us middle class; drive same kind of car.

Happy same way, sad and angry almost same,

Doesn’t seem right, 'God’s Men are special' I’m told. 

Just like me, he too enjoys the pleasures 

Of my God’s world - that isn’t pleasing. 

I know heaven is mine and his soul is to hell,

But it would be rewarding to see it fulfilled here- 

Right in this world where I pray and he doesn't, 

So I pray for a fate change either with me or him. 

But sometimes we have to take charge of things,

Do the work of God, like my forefathers did.

So I shun him in public, make fun of him,

He has stammering, I started with that,

Asked my children not to play with his,

Spread rumours that he lacks values. 

Poor guy, he has nobody. I have everyone - 

Those who believe, those who pretend to believe, 

Goons of other Gods and who not! he crumbles, 

Now there's a difference in our lives. Glory to God.

Deep inside my heart, one day, remorse, so

I prayed for him and told him generously -

“See what happens when you don’t believe,

But worry not brother, God has plans”. 

His House Is Burning

His house is burning,

But I want salt.

My salt is over, I have guests.

“Ask Him for anything, He’ll give

The He who’s neighbour to me, you and all.”

That’s what some preach.

So I pray for salt for I want salt,

But His house is burning.

“Ask Him for anything, He’ll give

The He who made salt, sugar and fire,”

That’s what they preach.

The they who ask Him many things,

Though His house is burning.

I want salt, I pray to Him;

But His house is burning. 

Her Father's Logic

Father: The guy is poor, just five feet tall, family isn't good and he is not educated enough… . 

She: But he has a heart of gold FOR ME. He loves me so much… , isn't that enough?

Father: Well… , I believe Hitler had a heart of gold for the woman he loved, so did the rats that had spread plague. That doesn't make them good enough for the world, does it? 

She: I love him. Doesn't that count?

Father: You also loved eating mud and bottling fireflies, thank goodness you don't do that anymore… . 

She: It's my life. I will do whatever I want.

Father: Sure you should, but just don't commit to anything; only make mistakes to regret tomorrow. 

Birth of a Prayerer

No student of mine ever told me,
"I want to become a 'prayerER', a person whose profession is praying, one who solves the problems of the world and betters people's lives with prayers."

Religion and Peace

One of the oldest literature in Chinese is religious
It reads, "if we sacrifice three children today, will it rain tomorrow?"

The Responsible Half

I ate the apple, I was blamed.

You ate the apple, I was blamed!

If I'm sad, I'm blamed.

If you are sad, I'm blamed!

When my parents bitch, I'm responsible!

When your parents bitch, I'm responsible!

In getting fat, I'm responsible!

You are getting fat, I'm responsible!

When you hurt me, I'm responsible!

When you hurt yourself, I'm responsible!

For my mistakes, I'm blamed.

For your mistakes, I'm blamed!

Last time in bed, I couldn't ‘perform’, I was blamed.
The time before that, you couldn't do it, I was blamed!

Son to Father

Please dad, let me taste this life. Or

I’ll try to be a doctor or another doctor;

Not because I would love to, but

As that’s what you couldn’t become.

You scare, you threaten, you plead,

All to make me an enhanced copy of you.

Your father tried and failed with you, now

You compete and struggle to wear me down.

Your unquenchable thirst to be right

Is smothering me to the nightmares,

Where dreams wage war with sense of gratitude

While eternal filial bondage blinding hopes.

Me, you, your dad, his dad: we are a disappointed lot.

I wouldn’t love so much to live

In a world where men grow up, from being

Unhappy sons to unhappy fathers.

You Know Who

Even if this thing doesn't kill me

Life changes for ever.

This kills very young and very old they say

I'm not very old or young. Good.

My grandmother is very old,

Neighbour's daughter is very young.

Will I be one of them?

Either of them?

The dead or the survived!.

Or will I be a Zombie?
Walking around converting others?

Beast Mode Stories 3

Scene: Tea Shop in Cantonment 

Teacher: How the hell do you smoke that burning cigarette in this hot summer? 

Soldier: (After taking a puff) How the hell do you drink that steaming tea in this hot summer?

Teacher: (Drinks one sip from the cup) That’s different sir. I don’t see ‘Drinking Tea is Injurious to Health’ written on my cup.

Soldier: At least I am puffing out the smoke that I inhale. I don’t see you gargling tea and spitting it out… !

Teacher: (Keeps drinking tea)

Soldier: (Keeps smoking cigarette)  

Beast Mode Stories 2

Scene: Village Neighbourhood 

Mother: Savi… , will you lend me a 1000 rupees?

Neighbour: Oh… , I am sorry. I really don't have any money with me right now, I made all my payments last week, so… .

Mother: Mmmm…. , that's okay, I will get it from somewhere else… .

Me: Mom, why are you embarrassing me? I am earning now. If you need some money, you could have asked me… .

Mother: Oh… , I don't really need any money. I am just creating an impression that I am short of money so that others won't ask me for loans… .

Beast Mode Stories 1

Scene: Firefox Cycle Showroom

Teacher (M.A., B.Ed): Do you have a cycle without gear which costs under 7000 rupees?

Salesman (10th): Definitely no sir; not just us, it’s safe to say nobody brings to market cycles without gear. It’s either Single gear or Multigear. A cycle without gear would be simply a showpiece, you would have to carry it around on your shoulder. Why would anyone want to carry around a cycle on shoulder? 

Teacher: Okayyy then…. , show me a cycle with ONE gear.

Salesman: Sure sir, this way sir… , unlike the ones without gear, we have them plenty sir, walk this way… .

How Strong Were They!

It was believed that the Allies would run out of tanks before a German Tiger would run out of fuel... . 

Her Father's Logic

Father: The guy is poor, just five feet tall, family isn't good and he is not educated enough… . 

She: But he has a heart of gold FOR ME. He loves me so much… , isn't that enough?

Father: Well… , I believe Hitler had a heart of gold for the woman he loved, so did the rats that had spread plague. That doesn't make them good enough for the world, does it? 

She: I love him, doesn't that count?

Father: You also loved eating mud and bottling fireflies, thank goodness you don't do that anymore... .

Their Replies

They collected the letters to return. 

Worthless papers full of love and hate -  

Tracing their affection to its peak and 

Gradual decline to hate from there. 

Both of them forgot who wrote first;

Even the oldest traceable letter seemed like a reply.

Neither of them wanted to be the one who began it,

So they started calling their letters ‘replies’. 

After all, even the first letter was

A reply to what the other didn’t say … .

Love

If it's out of fear of loneliness I stay

Would you still call it love?

I call your feeling 'love' though

I know it's just 'convenience' 

That's makes you stay. 

Closed, Locked And Silent

God

... , with just four people in this world, why would a guy do farming and the other be a shepherd? That post was definitely written in a society where collective farming and the business of cattle herding were necessary. Even with 400 or 4,000 people in this world, nobody would farm or herd... , that requires 40,000 or even 4,00,000.